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Shaq Shows He Can Still Dominate Around Basket Of Fries
BOSTON, Mass. (The Onion) — In an impressive display of physical prowess, gutsy determination, and insatiable hunger, Celtics center Shaquille O’Neal proved all his doubters wrong Wednesday when the...
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Cleveland Announces 1,000 New Jobs with Opening of Anti-Lebron James T-Shirt...
CLEVELAND, Ohio (Sports Pickle) — Cleveland Mayor Frank G. Jackson held a press conference today to announce that 1,000 new jobs have come to the city with the opening of a new anti-Lebron James...
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Pat Riley Glares At 1988 Bottle Of Hair Gel As He Mulls Return To Coaching
MIAMI, Fla. (The Onion) — While toweling off in front of his vanity mirror Monday, Miami Heat team president Pat Riley stared longingly at a bottle of L’Oréal Studio Line hair gel from 1988, pondering...
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Shaq Misses Entire Second Half With Pulled Pork Sandwich
CLEVELAND, Ohio (The Onion) — Cavaliers center Shaquille O’Neal suffered a frustrating setback during his team’s victory over the Toronto Raptors Tuesday night, when he was sidelined for the entire...
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